Further Explanation.

In a little less than 2.5 hours, my laptop will run out of power, possibly for a very long time. In New York, I asked a Mac Genius what was wrong. He said, "It's not your adapter. Your computer just won't allow power to be supplied to it." I've been telling people my laptop is sick, which on many levels is true. It shuts itself down for inexplicably long periods of time. Its backlight goes out, forcing me to put it to sleep and wake it back up again. The screen buzzes like it wants something, anything. And now this. My laptop is sick, and I'm really hoping there is something the fine workers at Mactivate, Dublin's Apple care shop, can do for it.

This has happened at a bad time. I decided to spend the summer living in Ireland, mostly because I've made so many friends and I'd like to be in their company for as long as possible, but also because there's something about this place that makes me happier than I've been--at least on a consistent level--in my entire life. I've been taking care of business over the past few days, most of which has included visiting the Office of Immigration and Naturalisation, finding out how I can save myself from deportation once the 30 days the airport immigration officer decided to wave me in for (even though I can legally have 90) expires, and making myriad phone calls to my parents to get all this sorted. My life has, once again, become an alternation of sequences of events that are either emotionally taxing or emotionally freeing. Take your pick. Point is, it was bound to happen sooner or later, I just wish not here and definitely not now. For all intents and purposes, this is my last summer to relax, though I guess nothing comes for free.

Except food, when supplied at house parties and BBQs (one of which I'm going to tonight). And when supplied at dinner party birthday parties (one of which I'm going to tomorrow). It's funny, but since returning to Dublin from the States, I reckon I've become a bit of a social butterfly. Who knew this was even possible?

Everything's Gonna Be All Right.

This was never meant to be a platform for the kind of writing that could be labeled "emo" or even "emotionally exploitative," but for the record, I would like to say I am angry and frustrated and anxious about the following things:

1. My current legal status as an immigrant, tourist, and non-EU citizen in Ireland.
2. My housing situation, which is stable but dissatisfying, and too depressing to go into detail about.
3. The fact that my nearly-3-year-old computer is in bits. (For those of you alarmed at my use of the word "bits," it's meant in the Irish/British colloquial sense.)

All of these things will get sorted in time, but in an immediate sense, they are causing grave consternation.

Things, however, that are good:

1. I have the Internet again. It isn't unbelievably fast and sturdy, but it will do.
2. My housing situation for next school year has been sorted. I'll be living in one of the larger rooms in the house I lived in this past fall semester.
3. I've once again been given incentive and motivation to apply to grad school, though for a program completely outside of the MFA sphere of things. This line of thinking is completely independent of the hopes and desires of certain people who would like me to attend grad school for all the wrong reasons, which makes me feel capable of being able to make decisions for myself.

It's past 5 AM and light outside. Must be summer.